|payingattention (payingattention) wrote,|
@ 2009-01-29 20:03:00
#22: The waiting game
I'm quite certain that I've done nothing but fail epically this entire week. Even the good things I've done, it's just not as huge as the bad. I don't know.
I'm very foggy right now. It's not the hangover, I don't think, but who knows. I should stop drinking. If I want to get better, I really need to.
I went on a rant and watched Emily cry in the stairwell. I don't think I've ever wanted to hug someone more in my life, because for the first time I finally feel like I can look at someone and know I don't have to say anything. She knows exactly how I feel. Not even Amy does. So that's comforting, at least, to know that while I was staying up all night drinking last semester, she was doing the exact same thing two floors below me. It's an unspoken connection. It doesn't make my depression go away, but I figure if she can get through it then maybe I have a shot at staying alive too.